I’ve been out of WoW for about 5 months as I’ve been tackling revision and exams, so naturally I’m miles behind what I need with regards to rep.
After crushing out dailies and signing my life away on contracts for the Proudmoore Admiralty, I’m finally there. Exalted and ready to go, baby!
Get yo self to the Stormwind Embassy!
So, after flying over to the embassy, everyone is assembled. Including a very bored looking Velen.
Jaina asks you to do something. Right within earshot of Anduin, she tells you that she wants to give him a present to commemorate the joining of the Kul Tirans with the Alliance once more.
This present is a fucking ship. Because obviously flowers just aren’t good enough.
She also wants the same shipwright as the one that built Daddy’s ship… holy fuck this thing is going to be huge…
Alas, Jaina also warns you that the shipwright who built Daddy’s is retired. Fun. Being dragged out of retirement just because Jaina wants to give her ‘Nephew’ a present…
She tells you to speak to Cyrus as he should now where this hallowed shipwright should be and that she will meet you there before teleporting away.
The fuck, Jaina… Couldn’t you have mass teleported?!? Or made a portal??????
Get yo ass to Boralus Harbour Masters Office!
Getting my ass to Boralus, I head down to the Harbour Masters Office and see Cyrus and that’s it. After asking him about the shipwright he remembers that they are called Dorian Atwater, but while it is known that they might have retired to Stormsong Valley, no one really knows whereabouts… Jesus Christ, it’s a big place though Cyrus, am I going to have to run around until I find them?
Jaina suddenly appears behind me, frightening the shit out of me as she definitely wasn’t there when I ran down the stairs.
While we are regaled with the stories of hidden boatyards until the ships were ready, Jaina has a plan B in case anything goes wrong.
She hands me a letter, telling me that this is to be used as a form of persuasion should the shipwright refuse…
What the fuck? Is this their execution date should they feel that they would rather do the gardening instead?
Oh, she tells me I can read it. It can’t be that bad.
Cyrus has pissed off without me and Jaina seems intent on just standing there… so I guess I’ll go and persuade the shipwright even though if they needed persuading surely it would be better coming directly from you Jaina?
To Brennadam!
Cyrus asked us to go to Brennadam so off to the flight path I go, paying nearly 3g to run this errand.
Once there, Cyrus tells me that this is a crossroads town so if anyone knows Dorian’s location they should be here.
He asks me for the letter which I almost hand over before remembering that I haven’t read it. I snatch it away from him and have a sneak peek.
Jaina is using vomit inducing arse-kissing to try and get her ship built. Ok…
I eventually hand over the letter and Cyrus tells me that I need to ask around to see if anyone has seen Dorian or knows where they might live now. He however, warns me that Kul Tirans are known to be liars so don’t believe everything I hear. While he is going to ask the Innkeeper who apparently never forgets a face, I wander off to see if I can find any one to chat to.
As I wandered around, I was greeted with “who?” and “Isn’t that the name of the famous shipwright? I swear I’ve heard it before…” for my troubles. Along with hearing how someone wrestled a whale shark single handed but was unable to drag it aboard a ship to prove what they had done. I was starting to see why Cyrus had said that they were all liars.
I also spotted one Squire Augustus III, who seemed to be having a moment as he was just staring at a door. I passed him by and carried on searching for more people to pester.
Someone told me that Dorian was dead, another said that while they had no idea where the shipwright lived, there were stories of them building a ship in a day. Another I overheard explaining how they told a potential date that they knew where she could drop anchor before accusing me of eavesdropping. They did have some useful information though, explaining that they cross paths sometimes with Atwater when they go over to Fort Daelin.
Someone else accused their friend of chatting shit before telling me that the Atwater’s lived near Deadwash.
Lastly, some broad that was right behind the flightmaster told me that the shipwright comes in from the north every couple of days.
Now I was onto something I had to find Cyrus in the pub to tell him what I had discovered, only to find him already looking at a map. For fucks sake…
I got told to go out to Deadwash and find Dorian myself as Cyrus had to go back to the Harbour Masters Office as he was too busy to deal with this shit. He then hands me back the letter telling me not to forget about it.
Off to Deadwash!
So I mount up and trot off down the path and suddenly find myself being shot to shit and bombed left, right and centre. I had totally forgotten that the Horde were ransacking this part of Brennadam and judging by the lack of concern by the inhabitants in the other part of town, they had forgotten too.
Dodging around angry goblins and random ass mines I made it out and started on my way towards Deadwash. Then as I rounded a corner, there it was. Some house I had never seen before. This must be new?
Regardless, it looked cute with all the little elementals zipping around and doing things.
Except it was cute until I got to the garden. Oh fuck. Its a Hentai statue….
So I’m thinking that shit is about to go very badly wrong when I realise that the horse is called Hurricane. Plus 10 cute points for that!
But wait… why are there so many elementals around here and why are they bound????
-10 cute points, retreat, retreat.
I find this dude in the front garden, doing retirement things so I expect this is the guy I have to convince to build the ship.
Nope! He tells me that the person I’m looking for is actually his wife and she’s inside.
It turns out this dudes name is Sal.
I go inside and am greeted with sass and some woman throwing something at a fire elemental.
Turns out that she heard what I was asking her husband, as she informs me that she still has good hearing. I realise that shes peeling potatoes and that fire elemental is her actual fire. Shes throwing potato peelings at the elemental to burn them up… Jesus, does this count as minion abuse? Does Azeroth even have a rescue sanctuary for abused companions?
I break the ice by asking her where the fuck all these elementals have come from, which she tells me that she just asked for help and there they were.
I do the ‘ah you’re a Shaman’ to her and she scoffs at me. What the fuck is a Shaman.
I guess someone better tell Thrall that all he needs to do is just ask for home help and his elements will speak to him again…
Once I can tear my eyes off the fire elemental being hit in the face with potato, I finally tell her why I’m here and she firmly reminds me that shes retired. I whip out the letter in a fashion that would make Cyrus proud at my memory skills.
She reads it and has a bit of a huff.
Shes a bit stroppy but feels like she can’t say no. The worst combination for anyone to be in. I have to go saddle Hurricane for her while she huffs a bit more. Fine.
She yells at me that Hurricane isn’t as wild as his name sounds, well not quite… oh boy. This could be interesting.
Hurricane is just standing there so I go to put his saddle on when Dorian screams at her husband asking where her tools are. I don’t know if this scared Hurricane or he is just a fuzzy wanker but he lashed out with his front hooves and smacks me square in the face before trying to hide in a flower bed.
Dorian just stands next to me as I try again to put the saddle on her fucking horse. All the while making cooing noises, telling me how much of a sweetheart he is. Fuck that…
Saddle on, she leads him off, yelling at Sal again to tell him that he needs to bring a cart down to the lumber yard.
He reminds her to be gentle with me.
Seems like even bringing down literal Gods won’t help me when it comes to dealing with Dorian.
She starts to wander off whether I’m ready or not, I guess we’re heading up to Port Fogtide to go and see a man about a slip, right now.
To Tidecross!
There were a fair few bodies on the path heading up that concerned me greatly. I didn’t remember these littering the place before either…
Actually seeing Tidecross made me realise where I actually was. Ah. I see void people.
So this is Port Fogtide. Where Brother Pike had us burn a ship down. I thought that the whole area was called Tidecross? Unless this name of Port Fogtide has been added in to throw people off the scent of where you’re actually going?
So while telling me not to make her regret helping me, Dorian gets spooked that the port is plagued by The Drowned and asks me to kill some for her. Does this mean that there are drowned slip workers lurking around?
Before I run off she also hands me three massive stone wards that somehow shes been carrying around with her. Telling me that while she used to hide her ships out of vanity and the excitement of the big reveal, she now has to do it to hide it from the void.
While she stands there shitting herself/supervising, I have to put them down for her in the specified locations but she won’t tell me what they do, I have to ‘wait and see’… oooookkkkaaay?
Galloping off, I get accosted by a tenticle face and realise that they are The Drowned. So it’s the void bois that I need to kill, not some haunted wet dockworker. Gotcha.
I put down the first ward. OH. It creates fog! And a lot of it. As I ran off I did start to wonder why he fuck we needed to get hold of the sceptre for Jaina when we could have just dumped a load of wards in the harbour before decimating the Horde… I spent ages having to listen to Flynn and Shaw trying to one-up each other to get that thing when I may not have needed to!
I followed one of the big stabby bois around the dock and then realised I was well and truly penned in once they turned around. I hid up a tiny hill and stealthed. I haven’t got time for that shit. I did spend time admiring the cut away shorts that it was wearing. Dat ass tho….
Ok, so third ward went down and there was fog everywhere. returning to Dorian, now we have to go to the big ol’ lumber yard outside Boralus.
But, isn’t that place crawling with Blair Witch Dolls?
Before she leaves, she instructs her two Bound Earth elementals to set everything up for her… there’s two of them. Two. And they need to set up the entire slip…
By the time I’ve stopped watching them, Dorian has already abandoned me. So I walk two steps to the flightmaster and take a trip to Hatherford, just north of Boralus.
To the Lumber Yard!
I find Dorian in the main office giving the boss a hard fucking time. This lady is truly living out the retirement dream of having no shits to give when dealing with idiots.
I get there just in time to hear her insult the owner and then inform me, while hes in earshot, that hes about as useful as a legless horse.
With the workers rallied and the boss man scolded for implying that the workers were lazy. We’re off to get some wood but under her strict instructions we are not to drop any of it and we are to leave her to deal with the beasties. I’m reduced to manual labour. The killer of gods is going to be a skivvy today and be happy about it apparently.
The piles of wood she has picked out are fucking huge.
She asked Sal to bring the cart down to get it all.
One cart…
How the fuck is all this going to fit into one cart?
More importantly, how is only four piles going to be enough to build the greatest ship ever sailed?
We pick up the first pile, a log each. The workers have slung it over their shoulders and I have to drag it behind me in my apparent weak way. Well, this is humiliating.
I’m not sure if Dorian hasn’t noticed but even though she said not to drop the logs, I’m literally dragging it in a way that it is carving its way through the dirt… maybe best not to use this one?
Fuck me, some wood doggos have started to attack us. Dorian tells us not to panic, just focus on carrying the logs. She traps them in bubbles of some description and they freeze in place. Ok. So we’re going to have a trail of frozen beasties behind us?
NOPE.
They keel over dead.
Watching the same thing happen to the Blair Witch Doll, I realise that shes drowning them. What the fuck…
We get the next pile, and I’m shamed once more. These workers are effortlessly carrying the logs while I’m still pulling them behind me like the worlds shittest dog replacement.
Fucking hell. I’m such a weed.
Dorian has switched it up and is now setting fire to the doggos as she yells at us that we need to make it up to the drop off point.
I have no idea where that is and force everyone to run around while carrying their own weight in logs while I try and work out what I’m even doing.
Where the fuck is the drop off point!!!?!?!?!?!
This shit is apparently tiring me out as my movement speed is reduced by 30%. I’m blundering around in a circle as not only do I not know where I’m going, I cant find anymore piles of logs.
Fiinding a third suitable pile, I now have some dignity back as it looks like the workers might be starting to gave a hard time carrying everything. I’m 45% slower than normal but at least by dragging them, I can see where I’m going. I guess that’s a bonus?
Shit, I didn’t realise that I can actually ask for her help if I’m being attacked. I thought that she just did it automatically?
OH! Turns out, I have to use both hands to pull this shit so now I’m defenceless. I have to actively ask Dorian to kill things for me or to heal me if needed. Like if she pisses off again and leaves me to get mauled by some twigs. So, she is a Shaman?
I’m still not convinced that this is enough wood to build the best ship Anduin has ever seen…
Picking up the logs from the last pile, I am now at a point where I couldn’t outrun the Gastropods in Throne of Thunder.
At 60% reduced movement speed Dorian tells us that Sal and the cart are at the drop off point, just up the hill.
Apparently to her, it isn’t very steep.
But with me visibly sweating with the effort, I stop to assess what shes asking us to do only to be sarcastically told, “You’re right, maybe I have got all day…”
Getting there. There is no fucking way all these logs are going to fit in the cart. No. Fucking. Way.
There’s 20 logs! Some are fucking huge compared to the cart!
But, as usual. That wasn’t the only concern. The logs themselves are ‘haunted’???
Dorian takes it in her stride and knows exactly who to go and see about haunted lumber.
Jesus Christ, I’ve got to go all the way to Drustvar to speak to a Thornspeaker about this…. Aaaaannnnd to go and get the metal.
I still cant work out how they expect to get the wood in the cart. Yeah, it’s not going to fit.
Wait. The horse pulling it is called Hurricane. I thought Dorian came here on the horse? Did she go get Sal and the cart before coming down here? Hes with two Bound Earth elementals, did they pull the cart and Sal just got Hurricane when he got here???
So many questions about all of this!
To Fletcher’s Hollow!
Man, I have to go to some place near Fletcher Hollow for the Thornspeaker and then to Watchman’s Rise for the metal.
But, isn’t the mine near Watchman’s Rise closed because of all the spiders…? Oh god…
Thornspeaker first it is.
I land and fuck off towards the person I need to speak to about the little haunted splinter I have in my bag. As I’m galloping along I come to the conclusion that we’re not going to be speaking to the Bear.
Wait though. I am going to have spoken to two people who have managed to showcase the two new classes that Kul Tirans have master that the Stormwind Humans haven’t, even though they have been hanging around with competent people nearly their whole lives? I’m dealing with Shamans and Druids.
So while lost in thought, I run through the spider land, the cemetery, the crazed animal forest and past the great stag as I scrambled up the other side of the river and towards the mountains. Coming to the realisation that it was the bear I was going to see after all once the snow lined hills came into view.
Nope. I’d clicked on the wrong quest to track as I was trying to dodge my way past the manic hares… I was on the wrong side of the river.
Time to yeet myself off of a cliff and hope for the best…
I’m literally miles away. Fuck. Back we go.
Met the great stag again on my way down, feel like a tit and he looks at me as though I’ve lost my mind…
…through the crazed animal forest, got dismounted by a very pissed off stag and his doe harem, mount up again, through the cemetery, through spider land and then hurling myself off another cliff, landing at the feet of some dude and his stick kitties killing stone things and skeletons.
OH. this place is where I should have gone. I literally fucked up two seconds after running into spider land.
So this isn’t the bear… this is the quest giver while you are levelling. Some woman in spider land asks you to send supplies or something out to him.
I present him my haunted splinter and he muses over it for a moment before telling me that this splinter and the log it came off was the source of the ‘wrongness’ he had been feeling.
Casting my gaze at a Drust construct causing chaos over to my right, I couldn’t help but wonder if he had been sniffing too much cat nip recently.
He asks me to repeat the levelling quest of killing skeletons, stone bois and destroying rocks. All to fill a cup with Drust magic.
Ok.
I head off, there’s no end of things to kill hanging around. Interestingly, I discover that while filling the cup, I end up spewing black shit out of my head. Of which, I ain’t no healer but that doesn’t seem good.
But being a stupid Hunter, I decide to stand in the black shit to see what it does.
Very ouchy.
It didn’t take long to fill. joys of being handed and espresso cup I guess?
The Thornspeaker tells me that it is bad, but that’s all he knows. Great.
I have to go speak to the bear if I want answers on how to get the ghosties out of my splinter.
Awww! I get to *cough* ride Arthur Tradewind again.
Although, he’s throwing himself up vertical walls, telling me to hold on to something. Then informing me to not look down. Sweet baby Jesus.
While I’m watching my life flash in front of me, Arthur is busy gasbagging. Apparently Dorian knows the bear? Arthur isn’t supposed to talk about it though. hmmmmmm….?
Hes also trying to convince Ulfar the bear that a goat travel form would be a great idea but the idea keeps being shot down with ‘dignity’… At least hes the most sure footed of the Thronspeakers. Good fucking job!
Once there, I get told to say hello to Ulfar from Arthur and then left to it.
I put the espresso cup on a pile of tiny logs and Ulfar tells me that we have to grow a plant.
This will put everything back into balance of life and death. I’ve heard this before from Priests who were clutching onto that blade for dear life… I’m starting to get nervous…
Some void wrigglies come out and attack. First three, then as Ulfar tries to zap the plant harder we get five.
Then, no sooner that it’s started, it is over. The plant is a balance of life and death.
Ulfar tells me that he has already sent over Thornspeakers to get to work purifying the logs we have so my work here is done.
Arthur is zoned out looking at a pool so I guess I’m making my own way back to Arom’s Stand so I can fly up to Watchman’s Rise.
To Watchman’s Rise!
The person I need to speak to is Chelsea. I fend her being cornered by a twig doggo who she insists was about to eat her.
The doggo has run off with the storehouse keys so naturally it’s up to me to save the day and get them back.
Aw fuck. It is the spider filled mine.
The fucking dog keeps running through all the spiders, stopping to taunt me to keep up.
Bitch! I don’t like spiders!
I end up chasing it into a cave… that I’ve not seen before… oooh boy.
OH MY FUCKING GOD.
ITS ALL OF ABBY LEWIS’S TOYS.
RETREAT. RETREAT. RETREAT.
And there’s a dead corgi called Princess. Nooooooppppppeeeeeee!
But! The stick doggo just dropped the fucking keys. Shit!
I pick them up and I have a question.
The keys are covered in drool… These things are alive? In the sense that they are not just comprised of moss and ‘organic matter’ that could mean that they have mushroom growing in them…
The stick doggo sniffs the keys. Oh god…
What the fuck? The stick doggo wants to be walked?
OMG, the stick doggo is Princess. She wants me to help her find her collar, chew toy and favourite bone.
Did Abby kill princess to enable her to make guest of honour at the tea party?!?
Just why the fuck are Abby’s toys here!?!?!?!
So Princess leads me to her collar, which is up in a tree.
She clearly was a corgi who meant business with a spiked collar…
Next she leads me inside the house here for her chew toy.
Oh. She tried to eat from the food bowl in the house. Now I’m sad.
Regretting murdering hundreds of her kind, I follow her over to a mass of trapped miners and a fucking massive spider to get her favourite bone.
Shes rolling around in the dirt. I’m not crying, you’re crying…
I’ve got the keys, but also this stick doggo called princess. I need to hand over the keys but Chelsea is convinced that this thing was going to eat her last time they met.
I’m not sure what to do. Looking at Princess and then over at the Storehouse where Chelsea is waiting for me.
I wander back to the Storehouse, Princess following at my heels. This is going to take some explaining to do.
Oh shit. Was princess Chelseas dog?
Turns out, inside that bird nest head, Princess has a brain. I had to find all those things for her to enable Chelsea to realise that this bundle of twigs is in fact the same dog that used to curl up on the foot of her bed at night.
Yes shes about ten times larger and will give you splinters but look at her! Look. At. Her!
Chelsea works it out too and while ugly crying, hands me a letter and opens up the Storehouse for me to take the supplies that Dorian needs.
Back the fuck up. This is it? This is the Storehouse? The chest?
I thought it was going to be the building you were standing at the door of! How the hell is this going to be enough metal to make a ship…
Wait. this isn’t even metal. It’s ore. It needs to be refined before it can me made into the metal needed.
Are we building Anduin a bath toy replica of a ship or something?
Dafuq? A wind elemental just appeared behind me and for the second time I’ve shat myself.
I wait for it to do something and it hisses at me.
OH.
Nice.
Is it going to fly me back?
Nope. it just fucks off.
RUDE.
What is it with everyone just leaving me places!?
Guess I’m flying back to the port.
Before I go, I turn to see Chelsea and Princess having some bonding. I guess there’s only so many ways you can pet some bark so I leave them to it and head up to the flightmaster to catch a ride back to Tidecross.
Back to Port Fogtide!
So I’m back. And all the lumber seems to have made it? There’s more lumber than we had to get though? And holy shit the fog in this place…
And holy fuck. There’s an almost finished ship. It’s smaller than I imagined though…
But, it turns out the villager in Brennadam wasn’t lying after all!
Ah. Jaina is here as well.
Best see whats going on.
Dorian remarks that she knew that her air elemental would find me to give me the note about an important guest. Shit, I didn’t read it fully. Smile and nod, just smile and nod.
I turn my back on them for a second to have a hasty read of the note she sent and it turns out shes not happy about nobles sticking their noses in when it concerns her work, she was asking me to come back to deal with Jaina for her.
Facing them again, Jaina is quizzing Dorian about if the ship is actually going to be completed in one day but more importantly how. Dorian pretty much tells Jaina, in true ‘old lady style’ with no fucks given, to keep her nose out.
Sal becomes peacemaker and offers Jaina a cup of warm milk so that Dorian is shut up.
Jaina politely accepts and then whispers to me that if the ship is going to be completed this quickly, we need to find a crew asap or we will end up just pushing a ghost ship into Stormwind Docks.
OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD!
Tandred is going to be the captain!
Jaina sends me off to Proudmoore Keep to find him and tell him of her decision.
To Proudmoore Keep!
Tandred is off to the side of the keep looking out over Boralus. He doesn’t say anything as I thunder up to him on my horse, screeching to a halt before I launch myself over the edge.
Couching politely, I explain that Jaina sent me, expecting him to finally turn around and go “oh?” at me.
Apparently, Jaina has already spoken to him about the proposition and hes just mulling it over…
Hes already agreed to do it, he’s just thinking about who to recruit into the fold for his crew.
Brother Pike is his option for Tidesage. Which is good as the only other Tidesages I’ve met either hate me or are dead.
A Lieutenant Tarenfold is his option for Master Gunner.
The Outriggers are to make up the rest of the crew.
Some of them will be more easily convinced than others however…
Apparently though, even if some are going to be a tough nut to crack, I need to ask them to do it. Because he’s busy washing his hair or something…
So I head back to the Harbour Masters Office to find Pike.
He’s not there?
For fuck sake. How many months and now he decides to go for a walk?
Is everyone at Vigil Hill?
I actually look at the instructions I’ve been given. Pike is out looking over the Harbour…
My poor horse is getting worn out at this point.
On my way over I start to guess that Pike is going to be an easy one to convince. He’s not exactly ‘tough’ over anything.
I find him. Staring longingly at the ships there and lo and behold. He literally just agrees without a fight as “who could say no to the Lord Admirals brother…” One down, two to go.
Galeheart takes me over to Vigil Hill and I find the Lieutenant playing what can only be presumed to be a Kul Tiran version of Polo that involves shooting things on horseback with a big ol’ gun.
He is apparently going to be the one that needs convincing as hes not happy about leaving the hill undefended. He starts yelling about where the hell are they getting all the parrots from while trying to blast them out of the sky. I dismount, expecting to go in there all guns blazing to deal with said parrots to convince him that he can leave.
Oh shit. One of his guards tell him that hes pretty much been next to fucking useless here as all hes been doing is taking pot shots at the parrots. They can handle it. Piss off and do something useful.
He agrees with them! Oh boy! He just wanders off on his horse!
Just the Outriggers to go!
As I come in over Outriggers Post I can see that Tandred has made an appearance! Err, this is awkward. I’ve entered the chat just as hes pissing off the Captain of The Outriggers.
Hes asking the Captain to be a First Mate. And saying that he wants all her crew too.
She’s not happy at being handed a demotion, even if it’s for the brother of the Lord Admiral. I can see her point.
Tandred explains that it’s for the new Alliance ship in passing and that seems to get her attention.
She presses him on if they are going to kill some Horde… I need popcorn for this…
Apparently they will be killing Horde and thats all she needed to be convinced. Her enthusiasm leads me to believe that she would have happily scrubbed the deck of a ship as long as it was bombing some Horde encampment.
Tandred seems happy, she starts packing up. Then he tells me to meet him at Port Fogtide, as we have to go and recruit someone else once I’ve finished speaking to everyone here.
I run off to the flightmaster and am soaring over the hills when I think back on what hes just said to me.
“once you’ve finished speaking to everyone…”
Speaking to everyone
FUCK.
Screaming at my ride to stop. I get dumped off and then have to sheepishly ask for a ride back.
Going back over the hills I prepare to run around like a crazy person, to speak to everyone about god knows what before headin back off to Port Fogtide.
I land and run up to the first person I can see. They don’t have anything to talk about, just generically greet me. Most people have already left. I find someone else, they just give me a ‘how do you do’ and carry on… What the fuck, Tandred!? I didn’t need to speak to these people at all!
I throw some gold at the Flightmaster and begin the trek back again. Over the hills, over Brennadam, through a windmill (this Gryphon is either on a mission or trying to kill me) back to Tidecross so I can run over to the Port to find that everyone is there already and the ship is completely finished.
Tandred is talking to Dorian. Holy fuck, she’s the last recruit needed for the position of boatswain.
“I’M RETIRED” she yells at him. Sweet Jesus, old women can get away with anything.
Finally though, she gives in and agrees, not without reminding him that if he puts a scratch on the ship she will have him run through.
Katherine is here as well! Nice, I haven’t seen her in ages!
They’re discussing name choices for the ship. Ok…
They all have an opinion on it…
Rosaline the former Captain but now First Mate suggests Anduin’s Wrath to ensure that the Horde know what huge amounts of trouble their in.
Brother Pike suggests Dawnsailor becasue the ship feels like a dawn sailor… moving on.
Tandred thinks that becasue the Alliance have a hard-on for lions and stuff it should be called The Lionheart…
Katherine suggests that as it’s for Anduin it should be something that either makes him cry every time or looks after it more than his kingdom, she goes for Tiffin’s Melody.
Jaina seems to think that one was a beautiful suggestion while I’m just stood there wondering what drugs these people are on.
She then springs a trap and tells me that I have to decide on the name. Excuse me????
Seeing as I cant opt of ‘Don’t look at me’ I have to pick one of their suggestions…
I pick one and then Jaina gives me the ‘are you sure…?’ treatment.
FUCK! NO! GO BACK!
I have to actually think about this!
Ok, so Dawnsailor is out as it sounds like we’re sailing in on a goldfish.
Tiffin’s Melody? Do I want him to cry every time he gets on the bloody thing? What about his Dad though? I feel bad about this one…
Anduin’s Wrath? This seems the most cringe inducing out of all of them. Hes going to be wincing every time he boards it.
The Lionheart? This seems the best out of a bad bunch and if he pegs it soon then it’s easily passed on to Genn, Jaina or whoever will take over the Alliance.
I close my eyes and tell her The Lionheart and nod when she asks if I’m sure.
Pike then calls me over and we row out to the newly named ship and begin to christen it.
We don’t smash a bottle of Stormwinds finest on its hull. Pike summons up the sea to seemingly cleanse it and then crack some lightning around it.
Shit is going down but on the flip side, I did get to see how powerful this softly spoken Tidesage really is.
Were on a boat!
I don’t know if I passed out from all the excitement but one minute I was next to Pike blessing this thing and now I’m stood on the bridge. Everyone is here.
But before we set off, I want to have a nose around and see what Anduins present is actually like.
It’s small. But pretty and they have really kitted this thing out.
Stormwind might produce some great looking ships on the outside but this is great looking on the inside too. The Ship is compact but there seems to be everything you need on the inside.
Coming down from the big Captains table, you have a small library…
Take the stairs to the right you have the crew sleeping area…
Take the stairs to the left and you have the mess area. With someone already three sheets to the wind…
The central stairs from this deck leads to the storage area and the guns.
Walking through the storage area leads you to the cells.
Which look like have held someone in them even though we only got this thing just now…
Heading back up to Jaina she tells us all that it’s time to sail the vast ocean to Stormwind.
No one bats and eyelid. I’m sorry? Vast ocean between here and Stormwind? Have you even tried the ship that runs between Booty Bay and Ratchet?
Jaina then nods at me to get this party started.
Oh fuck. I’m expected to sail it. Well. I hope that Anduin likes timber floating in the harbour for his present…
And were here in Stormwind! Intact!
Everyone is here, including my boy Mathias. Who has taken time out from stalking to see Anduins face when he realises we are stood on his present.
Anduin is actually thrilled. He asked what it was called. Oh fuck.
Jaina tells him and Anduin comments “may she be as steadfast has my father” and holy shit, I’m crying again.
Anduin then turns to me and thanks me for everything I’ve done to help bring the Kul Tirans into the fold.
He then presents me with a horse and a tabard to commemorate all that I’ve done.
I get my horsey out and gallop around the deck while everyone was getting ready to go back to their stations.
My job helping Jaina with her present for Anduin might have been done, but the levelling of a new Kul Tiran to be the pride of the Alliance was far from over…
Zionxi 